Sometimes you have to submit to the idea that you might be the problem, so I strive to fix that, however, that requires letting go, and that is what I am in the current process of doing. I guess this can seem like some sort of extreme thing I’m doing for whatever your imagination might think, but I assure you all this is coming from a genuine place, and if people do not believe it, then so be it. And I want to make to make it 100% clear, I do not don’t want people thinking any “sub-posting” I’m doing is about any of them. I am talking fully to myself at this point. My opinion, self reflection, and growth matters more than what anyone else has to say in this moment.

Caring about what others think have served no purpose for me in the long run. When I put other people’s opinions above my own care, it creates an imbalance that I really cannot ignore anymore. I’m tired of allowing other people’s toxic behaviors to affect me and playing yes-man because I’m afraid of a little controversy. I do not care anymore. I am going to be my true, authentic self. Self care requires a lot of self reflection. All that. But people were right all along. I wasn’t being a good person. This isn’t a sarcastic “I give up, you can be right” But I genuinely feel this way and I genuinely apologize to anyone I have hurt in the past. However I will allow the past to be the past and will learn from my hardships to move on and be a better person for the people who have remained here for me.

I discovered I am a visual thinker, and I describe my current mental process along these lines: Imagine a giant box. That box is my brain, and inside of that box is everyone I know. There is no order there. I now have to create order in my mind in order to create balance. I have to put people into classifications: colleague, friends, family, superiors, role models, acquaintances, etc. Each category has a level of how formal I can be with this particular category, which categories I have to stay strictly formal with, etc, etc. I have the people in my life who I am the closest to, tied in the corner, out of the chaotic process that is me sorting out who goes where. I don’t want them to be mixed up where I accidentally lash out because I’m using most of my mental processing for this task. They have to be out of the way, which means I have to be a lil distant for a white. Still check in, making sure they’re drinking water.

Once all that is sorted out, I can let my closest people to me loose. These are people I trust, and who have shown me that they genuinely care, even through my worst moments. These guys will be in my life until my death.


Once I have balanced out my mind a little, I can continue working on everything else I have been striving for. I will become a bit of a shut-in to anyone outside of my circle, and I will treat most people who have been sorted accordingly to the category I put them in. I know now that not everyone who is nice to me I should consider a friend. an acquaintance at best. I should learn to set a huge boundary between the two and never get it mixed up again.

Everyone who I no longer have connections with, where we fell out for whatever reason, I hold no more grudge, nothing will come from my mouth about anyone I am no longer acquainted with from this moment forward. They have been taken outside of the box. I have no ties, no feelings towards them as I would a stranger.

I hope every single one of them achieves their goals and dreams and finds what works best for them. What they do no longer concerns me and what I do no longer concerns them. And I will keep this promise. Mutual friends of previous friends have been put into the lower acquaintance category and I will be as distant as possible with these people.


I have a lot I want to do and focus on, and I will do whatever I can to achieve my personal goals, no matter what. No matter the cost. Nothing will ever stand in my way of achieving my goals, not my depression, not people, and certainly, no longer myself. Life is a battle with yourself, and I am going to win it. I say that with confidence and conviction.


I’ve made up my mind on what I want to do and I am going for it. Anyone who is not on the same vibrational level will be left behind. I do not care. Those who do not support me(out of spite) serve no purpose in my life other than to be a tool for me to grow.

Haven’t had time to sit down and post a blog update but I do now. Been very busy with a lot of IRL stuff. But here’s some doodles I did over the past few weeks.

Have a Selvestia and Beatrix

Here’s some doodles. I’m trying to figure out a good schedule to post regularly on my site. I’m thinking 2 or 3 times a week on Mon, Wed, and Fri. Or Wed/Fri. IDK, I’ll figure it out.

Due to personal real life events, Ghost Revolution will be postponed until Spring. However, there is an important comic on one of the character’s backstories I will post on GR’s 19th Anniversary(of conception) on December 27th. Basic character, lore profiles will be posted until then!

I also have a team I am building up for this: translators, assistance with story telling, on the verge of industry backing(will take a bit because I gotta prove myself to them). I am currently in the process of setting up an LLC and get trademarks going. Merch, too.

ANYWAY, ENJOY THESE WIPS!